• Christian Burne

A Brief Soliloquy on the Courage of Starting

It’s ten past three on the afternoon of the 6th of February.

The coffee machine is out of order. 

People are grumpy, vulnerable.

And scared. Very scared.

The clinic, as usual, is running late.

Up to 80 minutes.

But it's ok, ok, ok,ok because, we may been seen earlier.

If possible. 

And besides, somebody, somewhere is deeply sorry for the inconvenience.


This is a special place.

A curious, spectacular train crash of everything that makes us so tormentedly human.

Tricked out to look like a something different.

But no-one here is fooled.

Impossible chords of bravery, courage, sadness and hope chime between its walls.

And charge the air between the people that blink here.

Some of whom used to walk in. 

Many of whom now roll out. 

And stare ahead. 

Trying to remember where they placed the bread crumbs. 

Back to that 'other thing' they used to wake-up to.


I’m lonely. 

Every 6 or so weeks I come to this place. 

Alone.

My choice. 

But alone, nonetheless.

It’s a unique place in which I am able to be a unique version of me.

Stripped bare of ego. 

Grumpy, sometimes.

Curious, often.

Vulnerable and scared, always.

But uniquely, me. 

My parallel universe. 

Where loneliness hurts, but is necessary and welcome.

A bridge.

From that guy to this one.

Lucid, wide open, honest, transparent.

And sorry.

For not being a better this, that and the other.

For not having the courage to be more of this me, out there.

But that’s the goal isn’t it?


I’m trying.

We all long for beautiful, brilliant lives.

But beautiful, brilliant lives do not just happen. 

They are built daily.

With courage.

Humility. 

Sacrifice.

And love. 

(May that beautiful life be yours always.)

Love for others.

Love for ourselves.

Our ideas.

Plans.

The things we believe in.

They say graveyards are the richest places on the planet.

Ideas worth trillions, buried with their owners.

Gone but for the grace of provenance. 

Maybe those people didn’t love themselves enough.

Or their ideas.

Plans.

The things they believed in.

Or perhaps they were just scared.

Overwhelmed.

Couldn’t find where or how the start. 


To start

To truly start, it would seem, is the hardest peak to climb.

Because to truly start is to commit to a beautiful, brilliant life.

All bridges burned.

Courage

Humility. 

Sacrifice.

And love. 

For others.

Ourselves.

Our ideas.

Plans.

The things we believe in.

(May that beautiful life be yours always.)


I tried to start.

So many times.

But often found myself nowhere nearer to where I wanted to be.

Recycling in and out of hopeful elevators.


Or was I?

Has all this toiling in turbulence brought me to the very place to which I once pointed to on the map?

Is one man’s turbulence another person’s clarity?

Another person’s Calm?

Another person's means of breaking free and breaking through to their next level?

Were the bridges burned on my behalf?


Scored by Nils Frahm, they'll come to get me soon.

And that’s ok.

Because I finally found the courage to start.

To commit. 

To a beautiful, brilliant life (hopefully).

Humility.

Sacrifice.

And Love

For myself.

My ideas.

Plans.

The things I believe in.

Which, as some may know.

Includes Others.

You, maybe?

Your plans.

Your growth. Resilience. Success. Happiness.

And the things you believe in.


Strange. Or Not.

Between the walls of such a place. 

Defined by ambiguity.

Supervised by hope.

Indemnified be courage.

That I should feel so compelled to share such a missive on the hope and courage of starting.


So whoever, wherever and whatever you're dreaming.

Please, just start. Just start.

(ends)


Christian Burne is a transformation coach, therapist and life-mentor. Specialising in helping ambitious people break-through to their next level of happiness, adventure and success without fear, stress or anxiety.


Schedule a discovery call with Christian using this link to find out more about how he can help you, or the people that work for you.

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